Friday, March 14, 2008

mars strikes again

Anyone who knows me knows that I stand firmly in the camp that believes that, with few exceptions, adding sourness to any existing candy is a recipe for success. Therefore, it should go without saying that I was beside myself with the introduction of Sour Skittles some years ago, enthralled with the concept of coating all of my favorite flavors - red, green and, to a lesser extent, yellow - in delicious sour goodness. Hell, it even made green and the dreaded purple somewhat bearable. Then, some months ago, I was rather shaken to see green replaced by blue raspberry, a flavor that, in my opinion, has only been executed successfully in the sublime, seemingly rare (these days) Sour Blue Raspberry Blow Pop, a candy that, while amazingly delicious, I place sole blame on for creating the neverending craze for the flavor. However, clues on the packaging seemed to imply it was a limited time thing, which came as quite a relief. Little did I know that things would only get worse. Fast forward to this afternoon, when I purchased a package of Sour Skittles expecting the return of an old favorite. What I got instead was truly horrifying. Blue raspberry was still there. But wait, green is back! No, now it's sour apple - the anti-lime cabal strikes again! And wait, what the hell is this? WATERMELON??? So let's review here: you've kept the horrible blue raspberry flavor, added two new slightly less reprehensible flavors, and in doing so have left less room for the best flavor, which anyone with half a brain knows is red. So you know what, Sour Skittles? FUCK. YOU. I'll be taking my business elsewhere, specifically to those products featuring the two hallmarks of ultimate candy goodness: sour and gummi.

Also, what happened to Crispy M&Ms? Those things were the SHIT.

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