avian defense

I had a pretty sweet dream last night, the first part of which involved my dad's parrot, Magee, sitting on my shoulder and making really cute noises (the second part consisted of me, Britney, and Amy Winehouse hanging out in a really large swimming pool, but that's not important here). I mentioned this to Anna this morning, along with how I thought yesterday's picture of the crow in a tiny soccer jersey was precious, and she immediately reminded me that she thought birds were terrifying. Unfortunately, a lot of people feel this way, most likely because they've never had one that danced and gave them kisses when they sang "Build Me Up Buttercup"*, that waddled around the house looking for them when they weren't there, that randomly attacked their loved ones under the pretense of being friendly. Okay, maybe we should ignore that last one. Point is, birds are fucking precious, and I'll be damned if I let you haters bring me down. Unless I end up like one of those creepy guys you occasionally see at the beach that carry around giant frightening macaws - then, for the love of god, please say something. Or murder me.

fig 1. I have no connection to this bird, only severe envy of it's diminutive straw hat. I'm seriously melting over here.

*I have no idea why, but that's the only song she'd dance to - did I mention she was psychotic?